


Remember Who You Are

by AlannaofRoses



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe, Athena Grant and Bobby Nash are Evan "Buck" Buckley's Parents, Bisexual Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Bisexual Evan "Buck" Buckley, Canon Rewrite, Canon-Typical Injuries/Violence/Danger, F/M, Fire, I Mug Canon in a Dark Alley and go through its Pockets for Loose Change, M/M, Natural Disasters, No beta we die like mne, Peril, Prompt Fic, Spoilers through Ep4.5
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-14 22:34:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29549382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlannaofRoses/pseuds/AlannaofRoses
Summary: "Not flesh of my flesh/ nor bone of my bone/ still miraculously my own. Never forget for a single minute/ you didn't grow under my heart/ but in it." -Fleur Conkling HeyligerEvan Buckley was born to save a life. But it wasn't long before he needed rescuing himself. That rescue came in the form of Bobby Nash, a young firefighter just starting his career. Twenty years later, Buck and Bobby have surrounded themselves with family and friends as a new chapter unfolds. But when the past comes back to haunt them, everything and everyone they love will be touched by the fallout.Loosely based on a prompt by kbl55429.
Relationships: Athena Grant/Bobby Nash, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 36
Kudos: 382
Collections: 9-1-1 Tales





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the nature of the prompt I have made some significant changes to canon, especially in regards to backstories of some of the mains. I also do not claim any knowledge of first responder, disaster, or medical procedures, so please forgive any mistakes.
> 
> Notes on names and backstory changes at the end for clarification.

_Prologue: Maddie_

_Some nights, on the really cold ones where she is huddled under six layers of blankets or the hot sticky ones where the walls feel too close, she dreams. The bike is red, red like apples, red like penny candy. The bell chimes merrily as the bike wobbles down the street, the boy with the laughing green eyes holding on tight. She’s there, in a sort of hazy, outsider way, but he sees her. Reaches for her with one tiny hand. And then the bike tips, and the boy with the scared green eyes disappears. She’s screaming, and running, but all she can see is the bike. Red as fire, red as blood. When she wakes, it’s to Daniel shaking her, peering at her through sleepy eyes. It is a dream, she reminds herself. It has to be. Danny’s eyes are blue._

Chapter 1

“Hey Dad.” Evan poked his head into the office doorway with a grin. “Did you order me a steak or something? Because there is a seriously hot piece of meat pulling up outside.”

Captain Bobby Nash-Grant of the 118 sighed at his tablet. “Evan Buckley Nash-Grant, if I end up dealing with sexual harassment forms before I’ve had my first cup of coffee…”

Evan laughed, stepping into the office and slouching onto one of the chairs across the desk. “You know I’m kidding. But he is really pretty. Wonder if he’s into men.”

“Keep your hands off my firefighters, Buck.”

Buck stuck out his lower lip.

“And stop pouting.” Bobby added, not looking up from the tablet.

Buck sighed dramatically, slipping off the chair and navigating behind the desk, where he wrapped his arms around Bobby’s neck and leaned into the older man. “How do you do that?”

Bobby set the tablet down, tilting his head to smile lovingly at his grown-up kid. “Know when you’re pouting?”

“Know me so well.” Buck corrected.

A light tap at the door made both Nash boys lift their heads. A man stood in the doorway, shuffling awkwardly. “Uh, hi, sorry, I can come back?”

Bobby waved him in. “No, no, Diaz, right? Come on in.”

Buck circled the desk again and held out his hand. “Hi! You must be the new recruit. I’m Evan Nash, but you can call me Buck.”

“Eddie. Eddie Diaz.” The man answered, shaking Buck’s hand and glancing subtly at the namecard on Bobby’s desk.

Bobby caught his gaze and smiled. “Buck is my son.”

Eddie’s face cleared, and he stood a bit straighter as he reached out to shake Bobby’s hand. “Captain Nash, nice to meet you.”

“Bobby, please.” He motioned to the seat Buck had recently vacated. “Shall we get the paperwork out of the way?”

“Sure thing, Cap.” Eddie moved to sit, his eyes going back to Buck for a brief second.

Buck caught Bobby’s carefully hidden smile. “Perhaps once we finish here Buck can give you a tour of the station.”

“I’d like that.”

Buck flashed his Dad a giant grin and ducked out of the office, taking the stairs to the floor two at a time.

Hen and Chimney were cleaning gear on the benches after a messy call earlier. They looked up at his noisy arrival, their faces suspicious.

“What’s gotten into you?” Hen asked, one eyebrow raised.

“Oh nothing.” Buck grinned cheekily. “Yet.”

Chim groaned. “Looks like Buck’s got another crush.”

Hen shook her head. “Evan Nash, your daddy’s gonna wash your mouth out with soap.”

“Who is it this time?” Chim asked.

“Who’s who?” A new voice chimed in.

“Buck’s new crush.” Hen answered Athena Nash-Grant.

The detective standing in the open bay door was in plain clothes, carrying several bags from Bobby’s favorite restaurant. Buck bounded over to her, taking the bags and pressing a kiss to her cheek. “Hey mama.”

“Your dad here?”

“He’s finishing up paperwork for the new hire, but he should be done in a minute. Let me help you?”

“Thanks, baby.” Athena smiled at him, letting him lead her up the stairs. “So what’s this about a new crush?”

Buck blushed. “It’s nothing, really.”

“Evan.”

“The new recruit is nice to look at, that’s all. I don’t even know if he’s into guys yet.”

Athena patted his cheek. “Hard to believe there’s anyone in the world who wouldn’t be into you.”

“You have to say that.” Buck pointed out. “You’re my mom.”

“Doesn’t make it any less true.” Athena retorted.

“What’s true?” Bobby asked, coming up behind them with Eddie in tow.

“Love.” Athena answered simply, tipping her head back to kiss her husband.

“Amen to that.” Bobby smiled at her.

Buck rolled his eyes at Eddie. “Sorry, my parents are just like this. All the time.”

Eddie chuckled. “Nah, its sweet.”

“Well, come on, Diaz. Let’s go on that tour and leave them to it.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Ed.”

“No.”

“Edward.”

“Not a chance.”

“Edwin?”

“Not even close.”

The station wasn’t all that large, but Buck lingered over the tour, making sure to introduce Eddie to every nook and cranny. The other man was funny, an easy conversationalist, and he took all of Buck’s antics in stride.

In short, he was kinda perfect, which was doing absolutely nothing to help Buck’s crush.

They’d circled back to the main floor, leaning on the ladder truck as they chatted, when Eddie’s face grew serious.

“Can I ask you something, Buck? About your parents?”

“I’m adopted.”

Eddie laughed. “I figured it was something like that, but that wasn’t actually what I was asking.”

“Yeah? Cause that’s usually the first question.”

“If you ever want to tell me more about that, I’ll listen. But I was actually wondering about them being first responders. Did they, I mean, did you ever feel like…?”

“You got a kid?”

Eddie nodded. “Christopher. He’s seven. It’s just… his mom isn’t around. Well, she wasn’t around, and then she died, so she’s definitely not going to be around. And I just want to make sure I’m enough for him, you know? I don’t want him to feel like anything is more important than he is.”

“Look man. I don’t know anything about raising kids. But I can tell you that Bobby was a single father for the first fifteen years after he adopted me, and I always knew I meant everything to him. You love your kid?”

“With all my heart.”

“Then you just gotta make sure he knows that. He’ll forgive everything else, as long as you let him know he’s loved.”

Eddie regarded him sadly. “How old were you?”

“Three. I don’t remember them much. Bobby is the only parent I ever knew, until we got Athena.”

“They seem pretty great.”

“They are.” Buck smiled. “Hey, you’ll have to bring Christopher over to ours sometime! Bobby and Athena love kids. I’ve got two younger siblings from Athena’s side, May and Harry. We’d love to have you for dinner or something.”

“I’m sure he’d like that. Thanks, Buck.”

“Sure thing.”

The station bell rang, startling them both. Buck grinned at Eddie. “Ready for your first day with the 118?”

Eddie returned the smile, slightly nervously. “Here we go.”

Over the next few weeks, Eddie settled into the 118 firehouse family with ease. His medical experience endeared him to Hen, his easy jokes won Chim over, and Bobby quickly grew to rely on his steady confidence. As for Buck, he tried to take a step back and allow the other man time to acclimate before flirting further. It didn’t stop them from quickly becoming fast friends and partners in crime, to Bobby’s horror.

Still, their record was clean, and Buck walked off every shift with a spring in his step that his parents didn’t fail to notice.

Everything was perfect.

Until a 7.1 earthquake hit the greater L.A. area.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An earthquake hits downtown L.A., and Buck may not be ready for what the disaster shakes loose.

Buck is double checking inventory on one of the trucks when he feels the first tremor. He braces himself against the warm red metal, hoping it will pass easily.

It doesn’t.

“Earthquake!” Hen shouts out a warning, and the station flies into action.

Or rather, they try to. Firefighters skid and stumble across the floor as the earth bucks beneath them. Equipment tumbles, and Buck hears shouts as his teammates scramble out of the way. A rack of oxygen tanks falls over, several of the tanks bursting and filling the air with the pressurized gas.

Bobby rounds the corner of the truck, his face set, one hand gripping the firetruck for balance. “Buck!” He shouts in relief, reaching for his son’s hand. “Anyone else with you?”

“No!” Buck coughs, reaching back. His father pulls him in, and Buck can feel his father’s heart hammering through his uniform. “I’m okay, Dad.”

Moments later, it’s over.

“Everyone okay?” Bobby calls into the smoky air. “118, sound off!”

“Hen!”

“Eddie!”

“Chimney!”

Bobby relaxes as the roll call finishes. The air is starting to clear a bit. Eddie and Hen are crouched in a corner. Eddie’s eyes are wide, and Buck remembers belatedly that they probably didn’t get massive earthquakes in El Paso. They find Chim under a bench and shove some lockers aside so he can wiggle free.

They stand there for a moment, breathing hard, just looking at each other.

Bobby sighs. “Okay, everyone. Gear up. It’s going to be a long day.”

The station bell echoes him.

They aren’t expecting an easy call, exactly, but when Buck hears the report from dispatch his heart sinks.

_“Partial building collapse in the downtown area. Structure is extremely unstable. Multiple civilians inside. Expect casualties.”_

Buck tries not to look at the mess outside the window as they rush to the scene. He’s always hated these types of things – major disasters where a triage of resources is necessary. It’s not in his nature to pass by anyone who needs help.

He looks at Eddie instead. The other man is staring morosely at his phone. Buck taps his knee to get his attention. “I’m sure Chris is fine. L.A. schools are designed for this sort of thing. He’s as safe as he can be.”

Eddie nods. “Yeah. I’m just worried about him. I can’t help it.”

Buck glances at his Dad, who is pretending not to listen from the front seat. “I know.”

The scene is even worse than Buck could have imagined. The building is hanging on by a thread, leaning far over the street below. People are already stumbling out the doors as rescue crews pull up, many bleeding or limping painfully.

Buck leaves them to the medics with the ease of long practice, ignoring their cries for help or loved ones left inside as he follows his captain through the throng.

Hen looks at Bobby. “Any word from Athena?”

Bobby shakes his head. “You?”

“No.” Hen replies quietly. “I’m sure she’s fine, though.”

Bobby nods. Buck swallows hard, reaching out with one glove to brush his father’s arm. Bobby’s hand closes over his with a brief squeeze, and then Captain Nash straightens to meet the incident commander.

“One good aftershock… and it could all come down.” The incident commander’s warning rings in Buck’s ears as the team eyes the building.

“I can’t force any of you to go into that building.” Bobby says seriously, looking at each one of them. “And I’m not going to judge you if you decide to stay outside.”

The crew exchanges glances, but it’s Eddie who finally speaks. “Where do you want us, Captain?”

“Guys!” An officer hurries up to them. “You are going to want to see this.”

A man trapped on the eleventh floor, a flimsy sheet of plate glass window the only thing holding him against certain death.

It’s risky, and it’s exactly the kind of thing the dynamic duo excels at. Buck knows what Eddie’s thinking the minute they lock eyes. He looks back at Bobby, can see father and captain warring in the older man’s eyes before Bobby gives them the nod. “Be careful.”

“We will.” Buck swears. He flashes his father one last smile before he hurries back to the truck with Eddie for the harnesses.

It’s a harrowing climb, scrambling up what is left of the six flights of stairs between the fourth floor – as high as their ladder could reach – and the eleventh. The concrete steps list dangerously, chunks of guardrail missing at random intervals while debris litters entire flights with tripping hazards. Buck has to trust his harness more than once to navigate tricky sections.

He and Eddie are mostly silent, conserving their energy for the climb and whatever they find at the end of it, but the occasionally break the quiet to check in and bolster the other’s spirits.

Buck flinches at every sound as the building shudders and settles beneath them. He and Eddie are both hyper aware of what is likely to happen if the building faces any more stress.

A particularly vicious shiver rips through the building, and Buck clings to the wall, panting hard.

“You good, Buck?” Eddie asks. His voice is steady, but his face is pale in the beam of Buck’s headlamp.

Buck gives him the cockiest grin he can manage around his own fear. “Yeah. You?”

Eddie nods, gingerly returning the smile as they continue.

Reaching the eleventh floor is a relief, but their problems are far from over. Much like the staircase, the hallway is tilted crazily, lit only minimally by safety lights and littered with yet more debris. Buck and Eddie begin slipping and sliding their way to their best guess of the room where the man is trapped.

“L.A. F.D!” Eddie shouts. “Call out!”

“Anyone up here?” Buck adds, banging on a closed door.

They shout a few more times before they hear a response, hurrying to a door near the end of the hallway.

“This one.” Buck pants, quickly tying a line off to a support beam.

Eddie nods, bracing himself carefully before using the saw to cut the lock.

One swift blow and the door swings open.

“Help!” The man shrieks.

“Hold on, sir.” Eddie says calmly, tying off his own line. “We are coming to you. Stay still. Is there anyone else with you?”

“Down here!” A woman responds, clinging to a pillar. Blocked by furniture, they’d almost missed her.

Buck drops into the room, adrenaline flooding his system as his feet slip out from under him and he is forced to grab the door handle to stop his momentum. He pauses a moment to catch his breath, surveying the room from his new angle.

“Ma’am, are you injured?” Buck asks, seeing blood on the woman’s face.

“Uh, no. Not badly.” The woman answers, but she won’t meet his eyes.

Buck glances at Eddie, who seems to share his concern. Still, the woman seems fairly stable for now, while its clear the man is in a far more precarious position.

Buck braces himself so Eddie can slide into the room, the rope that joins them together straining his harness as he takes the other man’s weight. Once Eddie has reached the furniture and the line goes slack again, Buck turns to the woman.

“I’m going to throw you a line. Think you can catch it and secure yourself?”

“Uh, yeah. I…I think so.”

Buck tosses her the rope, and is satisfied to see her quickly wrapping it around her waist.

“Don’t move!” Eddie shouts, and Buck turns back to his partner.

They all freeze in horror as the glass begins to groan.

“It’s starting to crack!” The man screams in panic.

“Stay still!” Eddie warns. “Stay perfectly still, don’t even talk. I’ve got to get this webbing around you, get you away from the glass.” He moves another piece of furniture, creeping closer. “You good, Buck?”

“Yeah.” Buck grunts, bracing himself against the combined weight of Eddie and the woman who has started to gingerly crawl towards him, clinging to the rope.

Eddie reaches out to the man again.

It starts small, so small Buck prays he’s imagining it, but it builds fast and a second later he can’t pretend anymore. “Aftershock!”

The woman shrieks and slips, Eddie lunges, and the glass gives way.

For a horrible moment, it seems to Buck that the man is suspended in midair against a shower of shattered glass, and then he’s gone, dropping to the unforgiving pavement far below.

They only have a moment to process before the woman cries out, the line in Buck’s hand’s going slack.

“Eddie!” He screams. “Eddie, catch her!”

It’s terribly ungraceful, but somehow Eddie manages to slam into her and twist both of them just enough that they hit the support between the windows. The woman clings to him, but she isn’t as hysterical as Buck would expect from a victim who had just faced what she had.

“Ok?” Eddie asks her quietly.

She nods.

Eddie holds out a hand, and Buck tosses him the rope. Eddie fastens it about her waist, double checking the knot. “You think you can climb back up there?” He asks her. “Buck won’t let go, and if anything happens, I’m here to catch you.”

She gives him a tiny, grateful smile before setting her jaw determinedly and restarting the climb.

“Good job.” Buck praised her as she reached him, giving her a hand and helping her brace herself against the furniture near the doorway. “You’ve got a cool head under pressure.”

She glances at him from under her bangs, one of her eyes darkly shadowed by a bruise, blood slashed across her cheekbone. “I was an ER nurse for a while.”

“Hey, fellow essential worker!” Buck enthused, turning back to watch as Eddie finished his own ascent. “What’s your name?”

“Maddie. Maddie Buckley.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Buck just got a huge possible clue to his past, but with lives still in danger, the job has to come first.

Buck blamed the fact that he was still carrying basically all of Eddie’s weight on his harness that the woman’s words took a minute to register.

Buckley.

It had been written on the tag inside his shirt when he’d been dropped off at the safe haven site. He’d been old enough to know his first name and to hold up three fat fingers when he’d been asked his age, but that was about the limit of what he knew of his past.

But… surely this was mere coincidence. There had to be more than one family of Buckleys in the world, right?

“You good, Buck?” Eddie asked, pulling himself up to join them on their perch.

Buck quickly refocused on the task at hand. “Yeah. I’m good.”

“Ok.” Eddie continued briskly, glancing at the doorway a few feet above them. “I’ll go first, pull her up.”

“Roger that.”

It took some finagling, but eventually they made it to the hall, then the stairway, heading back down six flights of treacherous stairs.

The woman – Maddie – was a total trooper. Despite the fact that her shoes were clearly not made for the kind of scrambling they were forced to do; she didn’t complain once.

In fact, she barely spoke at all until they were about halfway down, she and Buck forced to stop a moment while Eddie carefully climbed over a blockage.

“Do you think he’ll still be down there on the sidewalk when we get out?” She asked, so quiet Buck could barely hear her.

“No.” He answered simply. “They’ll have moved him as soon as possible. We won’t be going out on that side anyway.”

She nodded.

“Who was he?”

“My husband. Doug.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” She gave him a tiny, brave smile. “I suppose I should have said ex-husband? Ish. I, uh, I didn’t get these bruises from the fall.” She indicated her face.

Buck felt his blood boil. He didn’t care if this Maddie was related to him or not, no one should do that to their partner. “I’m not sure what to say, then.” He offered honestly.

“I’m not sure what to feel. It hasn’t really sunk in yet, to be honest.” She shrugged. “But it’s over now, whatever that means.”

Eddie turned back to them, holding out his arms for her. She went easily, trustingly, and Buck marveled at her strength. She’d faced more today than anyone should ever have to, and she was still fighting.

Buck’s radio crackled to life. “Ladder 118, this is Captain Nash. I need a headcount.”

Eddie clicked his button. “Ladder 118, this is Diaz and Nash-Grant, all good here.”

They waited patiently as the rest of the crew sounded off two by two.

Until, “Ladder 118, this is Chimney, responding.”

Silence.

Buck and Eddie looked at each other.

“Hen, do you copy?” Bobby tried again.

Nothing.

“This is Captain Nash for Henrietta Wilson, respond.”

Buck swallowed. His Dad’s voice was controlled, but even over the scratchy radio connection Buck could hear the fear.

“Friend of yours?” Maddie asked.

Eddie sighed. “Let’s keep moving.”

Not quite a full flight later, they were once again faced with a major obstacle.

“That doesn’t look good.” Eddie groaned, leaning towards the pile of rubble to get a better look.

Buck tossed a glance back the way they had come. “Can we get around it?”

“I don’t think so. I don’t know how stable this rubble is, and it looks like there is a decent chunk of the stairs missing, too.”

“There was a door not too far back, seemed okay.”

Eddie nodded. “Let’s try it.”

It took a little prying, but they managed to get the door open. Then it was another precarious scramble towards the far stairwell.

“How you doing?” Buck asked Maddie, giving her a hand around an overturned maid’s cart.

“I’m good.” She nodded. “Adrenaline’s still flowing.”

“Hell of a drug.” Buck smiled at her. “You let us know if you need anything.”

“Thanks.”

Eddie held up a hand. “Wait a sec. You guys hear that?”

Buck stopped still, tilting his head to listen.

“Someone’s calling for help.

“In here.” Eddie moved towards one of the rooms.

The door gave way to a swift kick, and Buck slid inside.

“Help me!”

“We’re here sir.” Buck called back.

He and Eddie quickly moved a table and some other objects that had landed on top of the fallen man.

“Thank you, thank you.” The man panted. “I knew someone would find me.”

“We’re gonna get you out of here.” Buck promised. “Stay still.”

“Not much of a problem.” The man replied ruefully. “I can’t feel much below the waist.”

Buck and Eddie looked at each other.

“Possible spinal injury.” Eddie murmured, turning away so the man wouldn’t hear.

“How are we going to move him?” Buck asked, looking around.

Maddie poked her head into the doorway. “Would this help?” She held out a full-size ironing board.

Buck frowned. “Hard to get that down the stairs.”

Eddie hummed thoughtfully. “What about the elevator shaft?”

By the time they had the man strapped down and ready for transport, what light had been able to reach the inside of the building was fading fast. The good thing was that there hadn’t been any aftershocks for a while, and Buck was hopeful that meant it was over. They could use a little luck.

That luck didn’t quite extend to the elevator. The good news was that it wasn’t below them, blocking access to the lower floors. The bad news was that it hovered a few floors above them, meaning that a three-ton machine would be quite literally looming over them the entire climb.

“How stable do you think that is?” Maddie asked, peering carefully up the shaft.

Eddie shrugged. “No way to tell.”

Buck joined them, glancing up. “Eh, I like our chances.”

Eddie went first with the injured man, while Buck and Maddie waited up top and fed the lines. Everything went much more smoothly than it had any right too, and before long Eddie was prying apart the doors several floors below.

“Come on down guys!”

“On our way!”

Buck carefully swung out into empty air, holding in place so Maddie could climb out after him and wrap herself around his shoulders.

“Ready?”

“Do I have a choice?” Maddie asked wryly.

“Not really.”

They had gone about a dozen feet when the man suddenly spoke. “Uh, guys? Is the building moving?”

Within seconds they could all feel it. “Eddie! Get those doors open!” Buck screamed, pushing off the wall and rappelling down as fast as he feasibly could.

Above them, the elevator creaked and shifted.

“Let’s go Buck!” Eddie called frantically.

He was looking up, past them, but Buck refused to follow his gaze. He focused on the open door below them, making it a bright bullseye in his mind as they descended.

“Here we come!” He warned, and then leapt.

Eddie ducked back. The line swung out, further into danger. Buck let more height slip through his fingers, aiming for that bullseye. Maddie screamed.

And then she and Buck swung perfectly through the gap, the plunging elevator missing them by mere feet.

The four of them lay sprawled where they had fallen, breathing hard.

Buck rolled over, smiling in relief. “I told you I liked our chances.”

Maddie rolled her eyes.

Now that they were on ground level, making it the ret of the way out was easy. A few more scrambles over the buckled flooring, balancing the ironing board between them, and they were out. They handed the man off to a couple paramedics.

“You should go to.” Buck told Maddie. “Go get checked out, cleaned up.”

Maddie threw her arms around him. “Thank you. Thank you so much.”

Buck patted her back. “No worries.”

She turned to move away.

“Uh, Maddie?”

“Yeah?”

“Ok, this is going to sound weird, and I promise I’m not hitting on you or anything, its just, can I get your number? I want to check up on you later, make sure you’re okay after everything.”

Maddie smiled. “Only if I can get yours too.”

They exchanged numbers quickly, and Maddie promised to update him once she was released from the hospital. Buck watched her go, wondering.

“Hey.” Eddie’s voice broke into his thoughts. “Everybody’s getting out.”

“What?” Buck turned to see a line of yellow turncoats leaving the building.

“Building must have gotten too unstable to risk it.” Eddie said quietly.

Buck grabbed the sleeve of a passing firefighter. “Hey, any word on Wilson from the 118?”

The lady shook her head. “Still MIA, last I heard. Think the Captain stayed behind against orders to continue the search.”

Buck looked at Eddie, and he didn’t even have to ask before the other man nodded.

It didn’t take them long to navigate the trail left by the other crews. There were a lot more casualties on this level, many of them half buried by the rubble that had crushed them. Buck could only hope no one he loved would be facing the same fate today.

“Listen.” Eddie stopped, raising a hand.

“Another aftershock?” Buck asked, unable to place the strange scraping, creaking sound.

“No.” Eddie shook his head, a smile forming. “Too localized. That’s your Dad.”

Bobby and Chimney were standing in front of a huge pile of rubble blocking off a section of the parking garage.

“I think it’s far enough out that we can get behind it, maybe push it out of the way.” Bobby was saying.

“Looks like we got here just in time, then.” Buck called.

Bobby whirled around, and the relief that flooded his face when he saw them made Buck’s heart squeeze painfully.

“Hey Pops.”

“Hey kiddo. You guys alright?”

“Two for the win column. Tell you all about it later.”

Eddie pointed at the rubble. “Is that where Hen is?”

“Somewhere behind all that, according to her GPS coordinates.” Chimney affirmed.

“You know you guys are disobeying orders by being down here, right?” Bobby looked between them.

“And they will be duly reprimanded.” A new voice broke in. “As soon as we’re done here.”

Bobby stared in awe as the incident commander and a whole host of other firefighters poured into the space. “I don’t know what to say.”

“How about thank you.” She offered. “Your boy here is very persuasive. Let’s do this.”

With some heavy equipment and so many willing hands, it wasn’t long before they were breaking through the last barrier. Their lights tried desperately to illuminate the open space, clogged by thick dust. Buck held his breath, and he was pretty sure everyone else was too.

And then Henrietta Wilson climbed out of the tunnel, a tiny dog at her feet and a little girl clinging to her back, and everyone breathed a collective sigh of relief.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evan thinks about the implications of Maddie's arrival and tries to figure out a way forward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty short, so you get two for the price of one!

Seeing Hen reunite the little girl with her parents was a bright spot to end a very tough day. Buck and Eddie slumped against each other as Chimney drove the truck back to the station. Bobby had barely taken his eyes off of Hen, who sat next to him still cradling that silly little dog.

Buck stared at his father and wondered how to tell him about Maddie. What would he even say? If he judged it right, Maddie was probably too young to be his mother, although he supposed he could have been a very young teenage pregnancy. Maybe a cousin or aunt? If she was related to him, was she close to his branch of the family? Had she known about him? Did she eat Thanksgiving dinner with his parents?

“You okay, Buck?” Eddie nudged him gently.

“Yeah. Long day.”

“Amen to that. Can’t wait to hit the showers.”

Bobby smiled at them. “We deserve it. All of us. Good job today, team.”

“Thanks Bobby.”

“Thanks Dad.”

“Shower, eat, go home and get some sleep. Most of the emergency work is taken care of, so enjoy your break. You earned it.”

Buck bumped fists with Eddie and headed for the showers. The warm spray felt amazing on his skin, even as it exposed a few scrapes and bruises he hadn’t noticed yet. He was just pulling on some civvies when his phone buzzed.

From: Maddie

_Just got released. No concussion, just some swelling. Going to have some pretty bruises tomorrow. Hope you got your teammate out safe. Thanks again._

Buck quickly typed back.

_Hey, that’s good news! We did get Hen out, she’s okay. Thanks for asking. Do you have a place to stay tonight? I just realized your old one got kinda busted up._

From: Maddie

_I do, thanks. They put us up in another hotel nearby. Its not as nice, but it has hot water, so I’m not complaining._

Buck thought for a minute.

_Do you have any family nearby? Anyone who can help you out?_

The dots seemed to float across the screen for forever before a reply finally came.

_I came to L.A. because I was running away. Now I don’t have to run anymore. Thank you for helping me be able to get my fresh start._

Buck sighed. It had been worth a try.

_Level 5 backstory, huh? I get it. Just, be careful, okay? Let me know if you ever need anything._

From: Maddie

_Thank you, Buck. Really._

“Evan!”

“In here, Dad!”

“Hey.” Bobby poked his head into the bathroom. “You about ready? The Nash family bus is leaving.”

“Right behind you, Pops.” Evan stuffed the rest of his things into his bag and hurried after his Dad. “Any word from Mom?”

Bobby’s smile light up his entire being. “She called me a few minutes ago. She’s fine, headed home now. Should beat us there.”

“Oh.” Evan teased. “Now I see why you’re in such a rush.”

“You know it.”

It was utterly sappy, how in love his parents were. Still, it made something in Evan’s chest ache fiercely. He wanted that someday. When he imagined his birth parents, he had always imagined them as spies, or codebreakers, or something else so dangerous they were forced to leave their three-year-old son behind to keep him safe from their scores of enemies. But he always imagined them as together and as hopelessly in love as his adoptive parents.

That was probably why he hadn’t asked Maddie straight out about her family. If she was related to them, if Evan was able to finally get to know his birth parents, they would become real. Human. Fallible. Maybe they were divorced, or mean, or boring. Maybe they had abandoned him simply because they hadn’t wanted him. Was he willing to find out?

“Evan?” It was clearly not the first time his Dad had tried to get his attention. The car was stopped in front of the house, idling quietly.

“Huh?”

“You okay in there? Any injuries I should know about? Head wounds?”

“Nah, I’m good. I just, uh… can we talk, later? Just you and me?”

“Something wrong?”

“No, I just have something to think about, and I want your opinion on it. But I need some time first.”

“Okay.” Bobby leaned over and pressed a kiss to his temple. “You did good today, kiddo. I’m so proud of you.”

“Thanks, Dad.” Evan spotted movement from the house. “I’d hurry up if I were you, unless you want to be pinned in the car.”

Dad chuckled and turned off the ignition, stepping out just in time to sweep Athena into his arms. Watching them twirl around, Athena framing his father’s face with her strong hands before pulling him into a passionate kiss, Evan felt that old ache in his chest again.

Whatever happened with Maddie, it didn’t matter. Not really. These were his parents, and nothing and no one would ever change that.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Nash-Grant family reunites after the earthquake. Some house guests lead to revelations for Evan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this AU, the Buck/Abby relationship never happened. (Or I guess if you really wanted it to have, it was much less serious and Buck realized she wasn't coming back/broke it off much sooner then in canon.)

Evan is still sitting in his car when he gets another text.

From: Eddie

_Hey, you guys make it home?_

Evan smiles softly at the phone screen.

_Yeah. You? How’s Christopher? Glad he’s okay, I know you were worried about him._

From: Eddie

_He’s good, yeah. Um, I actually have a favor to ask you?_

Evan quickly tapped the call button.

“Hey.” Eddie answered on the first ring.

“Hey.” Evan replied. “What’s up? Everything okay?”

“Not exactly.” Eddie sighed. “Looks like our neighborhood got hit pretty bad. The house is okay, far as I can tell, although we probably don’t have power, but there are a bunch of trees and power lines messed up, and I can’t get the car through. I could get through if it was just me on foot, but with Chris…”

“Say no more. We have plenty of room, and you know we’d love to have you. Plus, I’d finally get to meet this amazing kid of yours.”

“Thanks Buck. And you know I wasn’t keeping him away on purpose or anything, right? It’s just, with his mom dying so recently, and all the changes… I just wanted to make sure everything was going to stick before I let him make a new family in case I had to rip it all away again.”

“Eddie, dude, I get it. You were protecting him. I understand that completely.” Evan looked out at his parents, who were walking towards the house hand in hand. He could see May and Harry’s faces in the window.

“You’re a really special person, you know that, Buck?”

“I do.” Evan teased. “Get you and your kid over here, Diaz. Oh, and we’re off the clock. Call me Evan.”

“Okay, Evan. See you soon.”

Evan entered the house just in time to be folded into the giant group hug that his family had become. Both kids were clinging to Athena, Bobby and Michael and Michael’s husband David wrapped around them. Michael and David had been over to pick up the kids for the weekend when the earthquake hit, and had stayed with them while they waited for news of the rest of the family.

“Everyone okay?” Michael asked, his arm warm around Evan’s shoulders.

“We’re fine.” Athena pressed a kiss to Harry’s head, then to May’s. One of her hands came up to squeeze Evan’s, the only place she could really reach with them all tangled up as they were. “We’re home.”

“I’ve got some food in the oven.” Michael said as they began to break apart. “It’s just some frozen pizzas, but it’s hot.”

“That’s perfect.” Bobby smiled reassuringly. “I’m starving.”

“Me too!” Harry added, and everyone laughed, breaking the tension.

“Hey Michael.” Evan followed him into the kitchen. “Do we happen to have an extra pizza in there?”

Michael furrowed his brow. “I’ve got two in, and another one ready to go in when those are done.”

“No, I mean, we are going to have some extra company, and they will probably be hungry too.”

“Extra company?” Athena asked, entering. “Who would be out visiting this late?”

Evan shuffled his feet. “Uh, well, Eddie doesn’t have power at his place, and the roads are basically impassable, so I might have said he and Christopher could crash here for a night or two?”

“Eddie Diaz, guy from work you like Eddie?”

Evan fought the blush he could feel creeping up his neck. “Mmmhmm.”

“Eddie and his kid are coming to our house to sleep.”

“Yup.”

Athena sighed. “Evan Nash-Grant, you have the biggest heart. Of course they are welcome here. The more the merrier. Put some sheets on the guest bed, then.”

“Found another pizza!” Michael said triumphantly from the freezer.

“It’s not going to be weird or anything, right?” Evan asked desperately.

Athena just shook her head knowingly and patted his cheek.

May and Harry were excited when they heard they were getting a new friend, and the impending arrival of the Diaz boys was a welcome distraction from the long, difficult day. Bobby helped Evan put new sheets on the queen-sized guest bed, Michael put in a second round of pizzas as his hungry family demolished the first, and Athena and the kids made sure the house was as accessible as possible for Christopher.

With all the preparations, the wait flew by, and in no time at all there was a knock at the door.

Evan bolted up the stairs and wrenched the door open.

“Hey.” Eddie grinned.

“Hey yourself.” Evan grinned back. “And this must be Christopher.”

“Hi, Mr. Buck.” Christopher said excitedly.

“Call me Evan. Its so nice to finally meet you.”

“Thanks for having us.”

Bobby’s hand landed on Evan’s shoulder. “Of course, buddy.” Bobby smiled at Christopher warmly. “Evan, let your guests in, please.”

“Oh, yeah, right.” Evan stepped back and opened the door wider.

Eddie carried Chris down the stairs, but once on the ground floor the boy got around easily on his arm crutches, casually exploring. He instantly charmed the entire Nash-Grant family. He let Harry ask questions about his crutches, he complimented May on her nail polish color, and even got Michael to cut his piece of pizza into bite sized pieces. Once everyone was fed, the family began to settle into their spots for the evening. Michael and David played a few rounds of card with May and Harry before heading home, Evan powered up the playstation and let Chris beat him in a racing game, and Athena, Bobby, and Eddie relaxed in the living room, Athena flipping through a magazine with her feet in Bobby’s lap while the two firefighters chatted.

Evan, emerging between races to make some popcorn, couldn’t help but notice how easily Eddie and Chris fit into their messy little household. He watched the popcorn bag spin, his thoughts a mile away until Athena wandered into the kitchen.

“Hey baby. You okay?”

“Yeah, mama.” Evan bit his lip. “I just, I think it might be time to see if Eddie’s into men after all.”

“Oh honey.” Athena chuckled, pulling a yogurt from the fridge and heading back out. “I’d say it’s well past time.”

His mom was right. It was past time. But it was also not the right time. Not with Eddie and Chris only a room away, sleeping in Evan’s childhood home. It wasn’t his roof, not anymore, not really. His own apartment sat midway between his parent’s gorgeous suburban house and the firehouse. But it was close enough for Evan to have a hard time falling asleep. And in the morning, the sight of two sleepy Diaz boys stumbling into the kitchen that held most of his happiest childhood memories made his realize just how much he wanted this.

Eddie yawned, pouring a cup of coffee into the mug Evan had offered him. “So, Chris is off for a few days while they clean up some damage on school property. I was thinking I might take him to the zoo or something, get him out of your hair for the day.”

“it’s fine, either way. We don’t mind having him.” Evan assured him.

Eddie chuckled. “Trust me, you don’t want a bored kid lounging around here all afternoon. He’s got way too much energy.”

Evan tried to hide his disappointment. “Okay. You guys still coming back here tonight?”

“If you’ll have us.” Eddie nodded. “Company said everything should be in working order sometime tomorrow, so one more night would be great.”

“Sure thing. I’ll, uh, see you then, I guess.” Evan turned away, fiddling with the tie on a loaf of bread to have something to do with his hands.

“Why don’t you come with us?”

Evan whirled around so fast he almost slipped. “Really?”

“If you want to, sure.” Eddie grinned. “I could always use an extra set of eyes and hands.”

“I’d love to!”

Eddie glanced at the living room. “Harry, want to go to the zoo with Evan, Chris, and I?”

Harry looked up in surprise. “Nah man, my friend is coming over to play playstation. But thanks for the invite.”

Evan ruffled Harry’s hair as he passed, headed for the stairs. “I’ll grab my shoes and stuff, tell Dad we’re going out.”

Eddie nodded. “I’ll grab Chris.”

Later, Evan was hardly able to remember what animals they saw, or which flavor of ice cream he had had. What he would remember was Christopher’s laugh as they watched the aquatic animals dive and chase in the water, Eddie crossing his eyes and sticking out his tongue as he attempted to get ice cream off his nose. Both of them grinning ear to ear from the back of an elephant as it plodded around the enclosure.

All too soon it was over, dusk falling as they pulled up in from of the Nash-Grant house. Chris scrambled down and darted inside, eager to tell the others about their adventures.

Evan lingered by the door, fiddling with his keys while Eddie disposed of the trash from their day in the garbage can on the side of the house. He doesn’t want to go inside; doesn’t want to break the spell this magical day has cast over everything.

And then Eddie is standing in front of him, and Evan can’t find a way to make him stay.

Until, “I want to.” Eddie sighs, answering the question Evan hadn’t gotten up the courage to ask yet. “I do. I mean, god, you’re so good with Chris, and your whole family is just…” He shakes his head in wonderment. “And you, Evan. I’ve never met anyone quite like you.”

Evan swallows, his throat suddenly bone dry. “I want to, too.”

“It’s just…”

“Shannon.”

“Yes.”

“I know.”

“It’s been less than a year, and Chris… I’m just not…”

“Ready.”

“Yes.”

“It’s okay.” Evan whispered, feeling Eddie’s warmth, pressed close to him under the house light in the fading twilight.

“I do. Want to.”

“I know.”

“Did you just try to _Star Wars_ me?”

“Shut up, princess.” Evan said, and then he kissed him.

It was brief, and chaste, just a quick press of lips. But something inside Evan’s chest unfurled, and he knew nothing would ever be the same.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As things settle down from the earthquake, a new storm may be brewing for Evan as his past begins to creep closer.

The kiss changes surprisingly little. Evan and Eddie are a little more aware of each other for the rest of the day. Eddie can’t quite meet Evan’s eyes for long. But their comradery is stronger than the slight awkwardness, and they spend the rest of their time under one roof pleasantly.

Eddie and Chris spend one more night before they head back to their place. Evan follows them out of the driveway, turning the other direction to head for his apartment. After a solid three days with the whole family plus two more, his apartment feels quiet and a little lonely. Still, its nice to be home, even if it’s only a couple hours before he has to report back to the firehouse for their next shift.

Evan putters about, finishing some neglected chores and reacquainting himself with the space before he grabs his go bag and heads for his jeep.

The streets are still a mess as he drives in to work, but Evan can see the obvious signs of clean-up efforts too. Debris is stacked in piles on the sidewalks and shoulders, road crews are out in force in the harder hit areas.

It gives Evan hope, to see his city rebuilding itself. No matter what, people would always band together and get through disaster.

He’s pulling up to the station when his phone buzzes with a text. He waits until he slides smoothly into a spot next to Bobby’s truck before eagerly scooping up the device.

From: Maddie

_Hey. This might be weird. But you said if I needed anything to contact you, and I could really use a friend right now._

Even as Evan finished reading the first message, another arrived.

_They released Doug’s body to me, and I’m not really sure where to go from here._

Maybe it was a little weird, and Evan wasn’t sure he was qualified to help, but he was also pretty sure Maddie didn’t have anyone else to turn to.

_I did, and I’ll do whatever I can to make this easier for you. What do you need?_

From: Maddie

_I don’t know? That’s kind of the problem, really._

_I totally get it, Maddie. Look, why don’t you come by the firehouse after my shift? There is a good coffee place a block away. It’s usually pretty busy around that time, but we could look over what you have._

From: Maddie

_Okay. Thank you, Buck._

_No problem._

The 118 is bustling as Evan walks in, the last crew heading out as Bobby’s team arrived to take their place. It was the kind of organized chaos Buck thrived on.

“Hey!” Chimney greeted as Buck passed. “Ready to get back out there?”

“You know it!”

“What up, Buck!” Hen grinned at him from the lockers.

“Hey Hen.” Buck smiled back. “Feeling good?”

“Cuts and bruises all healing nicely.” Hen confirmed. “I’m all set.”

“Is my Dad here?”

“Cap’s up in his office.”

“Thanks.”

Buck took the stairs two at a time, nearly running straight into Eddie at the top.

“Whoa!” Eddie said, reaching out to steady Buck. “Easy there. What’s the rush?”

“Nothing, I’m uh… just going to see my Dad.” Buck swallows hard, his entire body hyper aware of how close he is to Eddie.

“Can we talk later?” Eddie asks quietly.

“Sure?” Buck curses the way his voice squeaks out.

“It’s nothing bad.” Eddie reassures him quickly. “I just… want to clear some stuff up. Now that we don’t have Chris and your family around us all the time.”

“Okay.”

“I can buy you a drink tonight?”

Buck winces. “Oh, I can’t do tonight, I’ve got… something important. Is tomorrow okay?”

“Sure.” Eddie nods. “Ok. I just… don’t want anything to be weird at work, you know?”

“Of course not. I’ve still got your back, like always.”

“I never doubted that.” Eddie smiled. “I’m gonna go put my stuff up.”

“Yeah, okay. I’m going that way.”

“Yeah.”

“Yup.”

“Okay.” Eddie stepped deliberately around Buck and headed down the stairs.

Buck headed to the Captain’s office, fighting a smile.

“Hey kiddo.” Bobby glanced up as Buck entered. “Miss me already?”

“Always.” Buck grinned, sprawling across a chair.

“What’s up?”

“Remember how Eddie and I told you about that woman we rescued after the earthquake?”

“Yeah, Maddie, right? Everything okay?”

“She’s fine, but the guy who died was her husband, well sort of ex-husband really, Doug. Because she’s still married to him the county released his body to her and she doesn’t have anyone to help her with the details.”

“And you want me to help her out.”

“Well, I don’t have any experience here either, and I know Marcie didn’t die in L.A., but you at least know the steps to take.”

“I do. I’d be happy to help her out.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

Bobby regarded him curiously. “That’s not all.”

Buck squirmed. “No? Uh, so, get this, right? Her name is Maddie…Buckley.”

Bobby was silent for a long moment. “And you think she might be related to your birth family somehow?”

Buck shrugged. “I don’t know. I just… I never thought I’d ever find anything out about them, and it never really mattered. I’m happy here. But, now… I just can’t help thinking what if?”

“That’s perfectly understandable.” Bobby sighed. “What do you want to do?”

“I don’t know? I want to ask her, but how do you even start that conversation? Hey, I think I might be related to you but I don’t actually know because my parents dumped me on a street corner when I was three? I’m sure that would go over well.”

“Evan.” Bobby said patiently. “However you choose to go about this, what happened to you is not your fault. You are not the one in the wrong here.”

“I know. I just… what if she did know about me? What if she was part of it all? What if they hate me, and I jump in to their happy lives and destroy everything?”

Bobby moved around the desk, his warm hands gripping Buck’s shoulders. “Son, look at me. What you do from here is up to you, and I will support you in whatever decision you want to make. I don’t want to see you get hurt, but I also don’t want you to spend the rest of your life with this hanging over you if you don’t say something to Maddie now.”

“Thanks Dad.”

“How about we go talk to Maddie tonight, help her work through the funeral arrangements, and see what happens? You don’t have to decide now.”

“Okay. I love you, Dad.”

“I love you too, Evan.”

Bobby’s phone began to vibrate, breaking the moment.

“You gonna get that?” Buck asked.

Bobby picked up the device and frowned. “No, its just some weird spam call I keep getting. It’s been going on for about a week now.”

“There are spam blockers and stuff you can install you know.”

“I know, smartass.” Bobby said playfully, ruffling Buck’s hair. “It’s been getting around mine somehow. Probably missed an update or something.”

“Sure it’s not just your inability to get along with technology, old man?”

“Hey now.” Bobby fought a smile. “Watch it, kiddo.”

“Aye, aye, Captain!” Buck saluted sassily and darted out of the office, laughing as he hurried to join the rest of the crew.

**Author's Note:**

> A note on names: Bobby and Athena legally hyphenated when they married to Nash-Grant, which Evan also legally took. However, Bobby and Athena both go by their original last names in their offical roles. So Bobby is Captain Nash and Athena is Detective Grant on the job. Evan's legal name is Evan Buckley Nash-Grant. His call sign is still Buck, but his parents and close friends call him Evan. He switches between Nash and Nash-Grant as he pleases. His turncoat is hyphenated. May and Harry are also Nash-Grants, and switch between Grant and Nash-Grant as they please. 
> 
> A note on backstories: Athena's backstory is basically the same except Michael told her he was gay much earlier and they divorced more or less amicably and share custody of Harry and May. However Bobby never had kids. He was engaged to Marcy, but she died before they could get married. Bobby adopted Evan not long after when Evan was 3. Evan was 15 when they moved to L.A. and met Athena, and 18 when Bobby and Athena married. Currently Evan is 23, May is 17, and Harry is 12. Eddie’s backstory is mostly the same, except the Shannon storyline basically happened before this, with Shannon’s death being the reason Eddie and Christopher relocated to LA.


End file.
